7 Ways to Build Trust in a Relationship

Do you know these 7 concrete ways to build trust in a relationship? Often, what really makes a relationship work are not the things we think of first. For instance, do you think you always need to spice things up? Wrong! Predictability is more important than variety in a relationship. The following seven methods are guaranteed to grow your connection by improving the level of trust in a relationship.

• First, as I mentioned in the opening paragraph, you need to be predictable. This goes against the common notion that you need to “stir things up” to keep the romance alive. Sure, going to a new restaurant or giving a surprise gift can be nice, but most of all, we need things to be consistent and steady in order to make our relationships work. Consider that trust in a relationship is built on being reliable day in and day out.
• Next, you need to make sure that your words always match the message. This means that your partner needs to hear the words which match your body language. If you say you are happy but you are frowning, your partner doesn’t hear your words, he or she sees your face and the tone in your voice. Your parter needs to be able to trust what you are saying. When the words match the message, you build trust in a relationship.
• Third, you need to have a fundamental belief in your partner’s competency. If you don’t you won’t have the trust in a relationship that you need. When lovingly communicated, the truth is never destructive. When you do not believe that your partner is competent at some things (or indeed, anything), you violate the trust in a relationship.
• Don’t keep secrets. Secrets destroy the trust in a relationship. Be honest and open. Assume everything you know will eventually come out. Secrets require enormous energy on your part. That is energy that could be going into building the relationship.
• Fifth, don’t be afraid to let your partner know what your needs are. Don’ t make him or her guess what you need. Let them know. It is okay to be self-centered as long as you are not selfish. Indeed, if you are reluctant to assert your needs, you may go overboard in the opposite direction and smother your partner.
• Sixth, learn to say no. When your partner voices his or her needs, that is a good thing. But you don’t need to say yes to everything. A partner cannot respect you if you never say no. Refusing to be subjugated to the other person’s will actually builds trust in a relationship.
• Finally, always pursue growth. When you plant a flower, you begin by digging in the dirt. Digging in the dirt of our relationships can sometimes cause pain. But, through that pain, we prepare the soil for future growth. Don’t be afraid of turmoil, crisis, or questions. These become the fertilizer for growth and change. Embrace what is difficult.

When you decide to work on trust in a relationship, you are bound to encounter a little pain. But, as you work through this pain, you will not only become stronger as an individual, you will also strengthen your coupledom.

Add a new element to your relationship by getting to know each other better. The book 1,000 Questions For Couples will give you opportunities to open up to each other by asking each other questions. You can have several questions sent to your email box every day to have something fresh on your mind to talk about with your partner. Look at 1,000 Secrets here: see what I mean.

Honest Review of 50 Secrets To A Blissful Relationship

50 Secrets To Blissful Relationships - Book Review

Let's face it, there are thousands of marriage counselors and millions of relationship self-help books. So what makes 50 Secrets of Blissful Relationships by Michael Webb any different?

Let's find out:

Pros:

First of all, it's great to see that, unlike many other authors, Michael Webb let's you inside his world. You get real-life examples of ways to solve relationship challenges, all based on his own personal life.

Second, unlike many other “experts” and marriage counselors, Michael Webb walks the walk. Michael Webb has never had a fight with his wife of 15 years, Athena. Inside this book, you learn exactly what he's done to make this a reality. Everything you read, he does or has done to improve his relationship, and that's what I really wanted to see - experience and real-life practice.

The book itself is simply set out with about one tip per day and just continues like this until the end of the book. Just about every tip had me shaking my head in agreement, as it gave me real-life solutions and several of those “a-ha” moments of profound understanding.

Cons:

The only real down side of the book is that every tip is set out with the same formula: story or, followed by how that example ties into relationships and that exact topic.

If you're impatient or in a hurry, you can always start about halfway down and find out exactly what point he's trying to make.

Also, instead of the tip titles providing a clear “how to solve X problem” or a clear topic description, it simply has a phrase that ties together with the information. Now while this is no big deal, it would have been nice to be able to skim the book to exactly the advice I wanted. Although if you read the information on the sales page, you can work out what information belongs where in the book. So it's not too bad.

Conclusion:

All in all, this is one of the best relationship books I've ever seen and it definitely deserves a read, especially if you have serious problems in your relationship.

Click below for more information on the book:
50 Secrets to a Blissful Relationship!

Fear of Intimacy - How to Overcome It and Have a Closer Relationship

Would you describe your relationship as intimate? You may be thinking of sex, which is definitely an intimate act, but not the definition of intimate.

It's almost a cliche that men fear intimacy, but it's not always true and it doesn't have to be for you. While men may have a bit more trouble with sharing their inner feelings than women, women are not immune to it.

Do you even want intimacy? Some couples are comfortable having a more superficial relationship. They relate on a more surface level and seem to be happy with that. If you are in that place and are thinking something is missing, it's likely that you are missing a deeper level of connecting.

How to define true intimacy:

• Personal conversations on a regular basis
• Mutual trust
• Ability to rely on each other's confidentiality
• A deep emotional connection
• Emotional exposure
• Both people open - become vulnerable

People desire closeness to different degrees. Those who want it and go after it are happier and better adjusted in their marriage and in their work.

How to develop intimacy:

Use our feelings for good - we need to identify our feelings and be able to express them. In addition, if your partner is able to express their feelings to you it's important not to judge them or criticize them. By accepting them you enter into a deeper understanding of each other.

Self-awareness - Once you can understand your feelings, thoughts, needs, and behaviors you are much closer to being able to understand those of your partner. Being able to share these with your lover builds closeness. This awareness should help you be in tune with others needs and is the opposite of being self-absorbed. Becoming attuned to ourselves may show us that that there are changes that need to be made, which will help negative behaviors as well.

Compassion and empathy - Showing empathy means being able to experience "walking in their shoes", not just being sympathic to them. Your partner will feel like you really understand them and are there for them. You may need to work on learning and practicing true empathy. It calls for you to be genuine, really listen to your partner and not be judgmental. It really can be learned and you will be able to be compassionate when your partner needs it.

You may have to work hard at getting intimate with your partner. It takes practice. A willing heart and attitude goes a long way. If you are craving more closeness and connectedness in your relationship, it is worth working on it.

Maybe you feel like you are the only one trying? That you're just not getting through to your partner? Follow this link: to 50 Secrets to learn how to reconnect with your lover no matter how stubborn or distant they are and no matter how hopeless or difficult your situation seems.

101 Romantic Ideas Ebook FREE

Buy a packet of glow in the dark stars and stick the stars on the roof above your bed to spell out a message such as "I Love You" When the lights go down, your message will be revealed!

Want another? When you are in a romantic spot, ask your partner if she would like to dance. Place one earpiece in her ear and one in your own and enjoy your private dance floor.

This technique is particularly effective if the romantic spot you have chosen is somewhere where people would not normally dance, for example, the top of the Empire State building at sunset or on top of a mountain during a camping trip.

These are just TWO romantic ideas you can start using right away­inside you'll discover 99 MORE WAYS to express the love for your partner in creative and unique ways.

You'll also learn…

A unique "twist" to buying flowers (idea #3)

A creative way to cheer your partner up at work (idea #10)

7 'seldom used' words that really touch the heart (idea #14)

And many many more…